If you have ever watched or listened to Abbott and Costello’s classic Who’s On First? routine, you know that words are funny. This well-known back-and-forth about baseball was carefully rehearsed and perfectly delivered.
Sometimes though, unrehearsed statements made with no intent to be funny are almost as amusing as Abbott and Costello’s Who’s On First?
Our house is located near a farm where two donkeys live. Our two young granddaughters looked for the animals every time we drove by the farm. As children do, they often asked if they could stop and feed the donkeys carrots, or pet them through the fence or take a picture. Eventually our son met the owner of the donkeys, chatted with him about the girls’ interest, and asked the donkeys’ names.
The little girls were thrilled to learn that the donkeys were called Edith and Sunflower. Their “passing” friendship with the donkeys became richer when the girls could call them by name, speculate that Sunflower must be in the barn when they saw only Edith out grazing, etc.
The next time our son saw the farm owner he told him how enthralled the little girls continued to be with Edith and Sunflower. “I didn’t tell you their names were Edith and Sunflower,” said the farmer. “I told you their names were Edith and some flower. I think it may be Petunia.”
With Christmas just around the corner I have asked family members for suggestions of gifts they would like to receive. Our daughter-in-law Jenny dutifully texted me with two ideas of gifts for herself: a Yankee brand scented candle and an autumn wreath.
I mentioned to my husband that we should buy the autumn wreath quickly because with winter already upon us, fall wreaths might be hard to find. I also commented that I wished Jenny had been more specific about the fragrance of the Yankee candle she wanted.
The next time I saw Jenny I asked, “What scent do you want when we buy your Yankee candle?” She answered, “Didn’t I put that in the text? I want the autumn wreath scent.”
My mother was lamenting the sad condition of her vegetable garden to her sister. The garden was weedy and unkempt. Without realizing that words which are pronounced the same way can have very different meanings, Mom said, “What I need is a bunch of hoers working in that garden.”
My aunt looked shocked and said, “Goodness, Sister, I don’t think they do that kind of work.”
Our son Ryan rented a sod cutter to prepare his garden plot for planting last spring. I watched as he worked at removing the thick slabs of sod and asked, “How much does it cost to rent machines like that?”
He answered, “Thirty-five dollars a day. The manual is $20.”
I was astounded! I asked, “Are you telling me that the rental place charges you $35 for the machine, plus $20 for the user’s manual that goes with it?”
“No, Mom” Ryan said. “They charge $35 for the power-driven model and $20 for the manual model.”
James 3:2–We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check.
©Debbie Scales December 13, 2015 542 Words
5 thoughts on “I’m Just Saying”
This is so funny and sure hits close to home. Keep up the good work
Thank you, Shirley! Merry Christmas!
Debbie, you seem to have such good recall of past family situations, events, and conversations that come out in almost all of your blogs!! I’m impressed–seriously! When I read a blog such as this one, I’m thinking to myself, I know we have had some very similar “funny” conversations with twisted meanings and weird interpretations in my own family, yet no specific ones come to mind, But I very much enjoyed reading what you could share from your own unrehearsed conversations! These kinds of exchanges can be so funny, sometimes even much later when we reflect back on them over time.
Thank you, Becky. Who knows why the mind remembers what it remembers and forgets what it forgets? Who are you, again? 🙂
Ooooops on the grammar… I meant to place a “period” after the word mind!! 🙂 Sorry my comment was posted “unrehearsed”.