What I Wanted, but Didn’t Get, for Christmas

I enjoyed a wonderful Christmas season.

The best part of the holiday was spending time with my family. Have I mentioned I have grandkids?

But, as is always the case, (except in Christmas movies) I didn’t get everything I wanted.

You, good readers, are not responsible for my failure to receive these gifts. You’re the best. The fact that you’re reading this proves it.

Nonetheless, I will discuss some gifts I hoped, but failed, to receive for Christmas.

  1. I wanted all loud, hiked-up, smoke-spewing pick-up trucks to be banned from our streets and highways. This didn’t happen. I am confused. How is it that in a country where the American flag is removed from an academic building because one student claimed its presence offended her, these offensive gas-guzzling, fume-exuding behemoths continue to exist, though they pollute the air and assault the ears of 100% of the population?
  1. I wanted people to stop punctuating every other statement with the phrase, “O my God!” It is the response uttered whether someone has just spied a luscious new color of nail polish or been offered a two-carat diamond ring from a lover on bended knee. If I move into a cave where no one can find me, it will be because I can no longer tolerate hearing this phrase.

  1. I had hoped a magical fairy, something like a useful version of the Elf on the Shelf, would visit my home and organize all my paperwork and computer files. Alas, that gift also failed to arrive.

  1. I wanted to regain my slim figure and my ability to remember names; wished all spam calls and junk emails would stop; and hoped someone would develop a delicious, fat-free, carb-free, calorie-free, vitamin-enriched chocolate brownie that tastes like one made from a Duncan Hines mix, but those were pipe dreams.

  1. I wanted people to start using turn signals EVERY TIME they plan to make a turn, but, again, no.

  1. I had hoped people would learn and practice the rules of good grammar. Let me simply say that the word seen is almost NEVER the second word in a sentence. Speakers should not say, “I seen,” or “He seen,” or even “The Elf on the Shelf seen.” Furthermore, they should not mix subjective case and objective case personal pronouns when . . . oh, well. Never mind.

Thank you, dear readers, for indulging this little rant. What is the use of having a website if you can’t write about what’s on your mind?

I hope you got everything you wanted for Christmas.

6 thoughts on “What I Wanted, but Didn’t Get, for Christmas”

    1. Thank you, Pearl. My list could have gone on and on, but I had to limit myself. Of course, my #1 wish is the same as yours: that everyone would come to know and accept Jesus.

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